Christians are straight up FREAKS
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
