they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.