Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
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Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
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dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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