Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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