he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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