does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
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Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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