rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
