Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
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I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
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So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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