I heard we made out
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize