He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Found your dick twin last night
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize