my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
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