question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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