Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
