please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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