Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
