Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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