4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
