Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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