We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i just had sex bonerless
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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