why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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