i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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