Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
what is it with giant penises always finding me
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
