i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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