UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
not ubering you a puppy
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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