I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now