Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
