i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
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How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
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Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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