I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world