"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
he's gonorrhea incarnate
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I'm experimenting with sincerity
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize
