i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
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After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
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Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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