That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
