you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize