Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
