we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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