KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
