Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
