either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
