Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
