It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize
