yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
