I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize