so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Randomize