it's too hot outside to masturbate.
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
