They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize