FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize