so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize