Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
