I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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