I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Randomize
