It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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